Get MOVING!

I know everyone has had an illness of some sort where it seems like it's never going to get better.

I've been experiencing CIPN or chemotherapy induced peripheral neuropathy for a few days now. It has made me slow and a little cranky, not going to lie. One leg has a perpetual "catch" in it, and my toes feel like blocks of ice in the morning. I really don't like to complain publicly (or at all) so I'll leave it at that, but it doesn't feel like it's ever going away.

One of the solutions is taking steroids, and as I am now almost entirely tapered off Dexamethasone, I don't know that I'm actually willing to go back on it, long term. I know that's stubborn, but it's not like I can't manage. If I felt like taking a steroid actually drastically improved my quality of life, I'd do it - but I'd end up with leg cramps and pain from the steroid, anyway.

We had a great date yesterday evening, I had a pretty good appetite and managed to eat some pretty tasty eel. It's called Una-ju or Unadon. Barbecued eel over rice. Delicious!!

Pretty close to what I had.
Source: Flickr

It's so important to keep moving, even if it's at a snail's pace - and keep DOING! It's so fun and liberating to go on a date and have a conversation in public at a restaurant. Making googly eyes at my husband from across the table still makes me smile - after almost eight years - I hope it never ever gets old! 

Do stuff, seriously. If you're a cancer patient (or someone just not feeling good) with a serious case of the ouches and mopes (like me, sort of) then go outside anyway, if you're able. Two days ago I just sat out on my front steps and BS'd with my mom on the phone for a half hour. I felt the sun on my face and the breeze, and it was awesome. 

I am so glad that many have said that I'm an inspiration to them, but it's times like these I don't feel like I deserve the designation. I've been so whiny lately I haven't really wanted to post a blog, because I knew I'd complain. The thing is, it's okay to be annoyed with the crazy stuff that chemotherapy and cancer do to you.

I want people to know about these things, because they're real and they happen to people and there is unpleasantness and a degree of suffering. I don't tell you about these things because I want you to feel bad for me, to me it's no different than you telling me how your day was. 

Today is moving day! (and I'm at work)

I'm anxious to go home (I have two of those now) and to see my family who has come in from out of town to help. We have a few friends pitching in as well and I'm glad, because there is a lot to do. We have a cleaning team going to the old place tomorrow and Tuesday, but I'm sure we'll both have plenty to do ourselves. I'm sleepy now, so it seems a nice cup of coffee is in order - maybe when I'm done at the office! 

Stuff & Things

I am going to think carefully before posting too much in the coming days, mostly because I'm afraid that this blog will become a sounding board for my various gripes/side effects of chemotherapy.

I woke up with one of the worst headaches I've had in a long time. I filled an ice bag up and secured it to my head using a scarf that my aunt sent me - I must have looked a little silly while I sat there eating breakfast. At least my cats don't judge me - and if they do I can't understand them, so it's okay. I actually held off taking anything for it, and the headache is mostly gone.

Right now, I don't feel bad - but I don't really feel good, either. I ended up taking Zofran earlier (anti-nausea) and am currently picking at my lunch. I ate several strawberries (how I wish they were in season longer, Driscoll's aren't that great!) and a few pretzels. I'm tired but not that tired... It's like I'm in a side effect limbo, I suppose.

The official "big" moving day is drawing near!! My husband has been taking little carloads of things over recently, and each time one of the other neighbors has come out and offered to help him. On the occasions that I have been with him when this happens, I feel a little sheepish for not having armloads of boxes, myself. Pinterest has been keeping me sane, because I get to sort of pretend that I'm shopping for items for our new place. It's fun, and gives me ideas for later. I definitely want to decorate and furnish the new place like it's a home (it is, after all) so I can keep all my ideas neatly in one spot!

I have a lot of friends that are riding in the Pan Ohio Hope Ride, which involves biking 328 miles across Ohio - all in the name of raising awareness about cancer. I hope to do the ride one of these days, maybe (realistically) in a year or so. I need to work on this stupid cancer first!!

Jeni's Ice Creams brought back their peach jam ice cream and I am ready and willing to sample it, for uh... Science!

When I left the hospital yesterday, it felt like we'd magically transported to September. I love the cooler weather, though it means beach trips would be kind of chilly. I've only been out to swim at the lake twice this year, and I definitely want to go more - but the cooler weather feels so nice, it makes me want to be outside more.

I won't bother reporting on my Decadron/Dexamethasone withdrawals, they exist - life goes on. 

Soup sounds delicious right now. Do you have a favorite recipe? I'm looking at French Onion soup (my husband just picked up sweet onions at the market) and Posole. Post a link to your favorite soup recipe in comments if you want!