Limited Edition

Undergoing treatment comes with limitations.

There's a monthly (bike) ride happening tonight that I desperately want to participate in. I had CyberKnife yesterday, so I was curious about going on a bike ride tonight. I finally got a hold of my nurse in Radiation Oncology who feels it's probably not a good idea to go on longer rides right now. She asked if I was having any headache and I said yes (which is common, evidently). She didn't think being out in the sun was a good idea right now. The doctor feels it's a good idea to keep rides at a "leisurely pace" and under 10 miles round trip until radiation is complete and I can be evaluated (MRI and CT).

Unfortunately, the total distance for my ride tonight would be at a minimum 16, but likely around 20-22. It really bothers me to not be able to ride longer distances right now. I know I couldn't do a hammer ride or anything - but I feel like if I could go slow enough (10-12 MPH) I could easily bang out 20+ miles...

Bleh.

I'm going to buy some panniers for my hybrid bicycle and start exclusively biking to the store (weather permitting) so that I have that excuse to hop on my bike. I only live a mile away from my office, but the short ride to work in the morning has been liberating. I'm slightly afraid of riding up the hill, because the last time I did that was when I started having headaches - then they found the tumors in my brain.

I understand the reason for limitations, but in a way they make me feel like slightly less of a person sometimes.

Roid Rage

Out of all the medicines I've had to take since I was diagnosed with cancer, I am at my wit's end with one in particular. I feel like a child whining about this, but the steroid I'm on (Dexamethasone) really sucks. There's a laundry list of side effects, the worst (for me) being acid reflux. When I was not on the study drug, I was told I could take Pepcid/Nexium or other things like that. Now that I'm back on the study, drugs like those are a no-go. I have to rely on Tums or some other chewable stuff that doesn't really work. I wake up at least twice a week with reflux so bad I can't get back to bed for at least an hour.

Now, I'm broken out like a leper - and I've plastered myself in calamine all over my shoulders and neck. Yes, this is also evidently a side effect. I hate it. I keep reminding myself that I had horrible headaches before I started this medicine, that in an evening they went away and I slept peacefully - but seriously? There's no end. I looked at one side effect list, and I basically have all of the "minor" side effects. Come on.

In better news, the port area seems to be healing. There's some tenderness, part of me thinks there's a little bit of suture stuck in there, but overall it's not terribly bad. I can feel it "settling" (if that makes any sense) and that's a little surreal.

It's been very hot here. We put the air conditioner in the window and now I don't want to leave the bedroom. That's fair, right?

Oh and if you were wondering, I'm still addicted to avocado. Maybe that's a side effect. Probably. I'll enjoy this sweet romance while it lasts.