CyberKnife 2 : Radiation Boogaloo

Today's CyberKnife music was brought to me by the Mamas and the Papas, for the most part. I have the choice to bring in CDs if I want to, but we've had some mishaps with burning music so I've relied on what they have. Hopefully I will have my own sweet jams for session three.

Initially the treatment seemed to take more out of me. I felt dizzy and a little disoriented - more than before... But maybe my head was just squished a little too much in the mask. I felt and still feel a little more lethargic today. I ate lunch when I got back to work and feel a little better.

I'll be happy when I can lay down and rest, to be honest.

The session didn't last as long, but I was still there receiving treatment for 30-45 minutes. It's not so bad - again the mask is a little surreal and it wasn't on tightly enough at first so when they were setting me up, they had to come in the room and re-adjust me so I was nice and immobile.

There's an oncology social worker that visits me from time to time, and she stopped the room where I was waiting and brought me a card/brochure for art therapy - I can decorate my radiation mask when I'm done.

Art is very important to me, it always has been in a way - I had a job a few years back where I'd bring pens and markers to work to doodle - and eventually my boss took my art supplies from me... That only made me more creative and defiant.

I'm looking to get back into some sort of exercise program. Hopefully I'll be able to lift weights some, but I think I'll be doing it at a significantly lower intensity than before. I'm thinking more about trying yoga, and seeing if I can find water aerobics in my area (the class in the winter was unreliable due to weather and other issues, I'm guessing). I don't feel as fast or as strong right now, but I've got to keep moving.

We did find strawberries yesterday. They're delicious - I had some with breakfast and lunch!!

CyberKnife #1 - A Trip Report

First CyberKnife appointment... Complete!

Truthfully, it wasn't that bad. The weirdest part is having this on your face:

Not mine, just an example!

This mask is tight and I'm not saying "Yo, this mask is TIGHT!" as in that it's cool. No, you will have little "grill marks" across your face for a while after it comes off. After an hour, it's kind of uncomfortable. The mask is screwed to the table, and you cannot move your face or head at all. They also made me a nice little cushion for the back of my head, so that helped. 

As of right now (about 1.5 hours post-radiation) I am tired. Walking up the stairs to my office afterwards was kind of tiring. I feel a little spaced out and dizzy if I stand up too much - but pretty much okay. 

I think I'll probably sleep well tonight, and not feel like doing a whole lot. I was able to eat when I got back to the office (spoiler alert: avocado was involved) and I'm not really nauseated at this point. I was told side effects can crop up in a day or so, but we'll see. 

The mixtape we made to listen to actually didn't work - it stopped playing after the second track... So I had to listen to some horrible opera - which was barely distinguishable over the buzz of the machine anyway. The CyberKnife was a little interesting, the "arm" of the machine moves around as it targets the various tumors. 

On that note, the detailed scans that they performed last week did find additional tumors. The initial scans last month found a total of four - one in the mid-brain (brain stem). The MRI/CT that they did last week takes finer slices (1mm, I think?) and they've located a total of 10. The doctor assured this does not mean the cancer has progressed further, but that the detailed scan was needed to make sure they are able to target EVERYTHING. I'm glad they're so thorough. 

More happy news, no weight gain from steroids. Avocados are the way and the light. Now though? I'm really jonesin' for strawberries. Who has strawberries? Teleport me some?

That's it for now! Go eat an avocado!

Avocado

I had a pretty emotionally draining day, and little of it had to directly do with cancer. It wasn't all good, but I'm trying to focus on what actually went well. I ended up taking a Xanax, which I have to do at rare times when I can't manage my anxiety.

I participated in a phone call today where I was able to share my story with some local political and healthcare personnel, in hopes to bring a fundraising event for lung cancer to Cleveland. There's still a lot of work to do and more phone calls to make, but I made a start today and I feel very accomplished for my tiny feat.

My favorite farm, Rittman - will have their berries at the market in the morning. I have to get up early so I can get them to make a strawberry pie for my husband's birthday. Later on, we'll hit the Cleveland Flea and hopefully see some friends and family in the process.

My in-laws are coming to Cleveland to visit us tomorrow and I think we'll have dinner - I am not sure what else we'll do but it will be good to see them!

I titled my post "Avocado" because I'm currently obsessed with avocado. I had it on a burger last night, I ate it at the restaurant we went to last week and I may (or may not) have eaten more for lunch today. I know there'll be a time where I'll get sick of it eventually but for now I'm going to ride that yummy green wave.