Om Shimano Pad My Bum...

I have some pretty big dreams for this summer. I promise not to cry too much if I can't achieve them. First of all, I want you to get comfortable - we're going to see if we can't slip you into my brain for a minute. Pardon the worms, and wipe your feet.

My mind is a temple. With worms. A worm temple. Yes.

Listen to this. Don't click till you're ready. This is an investment.

Don't do it if you don't want to, but if you don't listen to at least some of the song, much of this will make zero sense to you. 

If you don't have Spotify, that link probably won't work for you. Try this one instead. I hope you have AdBlock because otherwise it's going to mess with your mojo if you get a Betty Crocker Ad before you get inside my head. Please try to go for the Spotify link, it sounds better. No, I will not help you install Spotify or explain it or anything. If you don't have it and don't want it, go for YouTube. 

Are we good now? 

You sure?

Okay. Press play.

Enjoy the beeping and the booping in the beginning, but once you get to about 0:20 in this song - get ready to spin. This is my legs burning in a fat gear on wide open pavement. 0:58 is the wind and the sun in my face. After that, we're gonna spin some more. We're invincible. Our legs hurt, but it's temporary.

We're in my brain. We're riding a bike, together. You and me, right now - in my brain. 

Know what this song makes me want to do? If you said ride a bike, get out. Of course I want to ride a bike. I have wanted to ride my damn bike since the pain got so bad I couldn't. No. I want to ride in a time trial again. Do I expect to get a medal? No. Not even close. I'd be impressed if my LCPR (lung cancer personal record) was over 11-12 miles an hour. 

But I want to get on my bike and I want to try. I want to rock that TT out and do it proudly. Who cares if I'm not the fastest? I'll probably be the slowest but I'm riding with janky lungs and all sorts of other things. Honestly, this post is probably making my oncologist's toes curl, and not in some Herbal Essences "totally organic experience" sort of way.

I don't know that I'll be able to do a time trial. I don't know if and how much I'll be able to ride at all, honestly. If it's relatively warm and not wet out, I'm going to try - believe me. 

Last weekend my husband and I escaped to Miami Beach and I actually rode a CitiBike for two miles. Those bikes are clunky, awkward and heavy - but they're bikes and I rode one. The only reason we stopped (aside from Miami Beach not being very bike friendly) was that it was 85 degrees out and I was totally not used to riding in that weather. 

I'm hoping my corner of Ohio continues to thaw and I can get back in the saddle soon, if only to see how it feels to ride a bike that doesn't weigh 200 pounds. I'm spoiled, I know. My road bike weighs 23 pounds *snaps spandex*.

So, those dreams. In no particular order, I wanna:

1. Ride in as many Critical Mass rides as I can.

2. Ride in at least one NE Ohio Time Trial.

3. Ride in at least one bike tour.

4. Ride.

5. Ride.

6. Ride.

I don't expect to hit 1000 miles. Who knows if I could even do 100 this summer? Hopefully? I'm not setting any hard numbers. It doesn't matter how far or how fast you go, it's that you're OUTSIDE and you're doing SOMETHING and hopefully, it's fun. That's what I want to do, is put a little fun between my legs this summer.

Perverts.